Friends and Lovers
by The Lady Morana
Summary: “Well, you see, there are people you love, and then there are other people you’d almost rather be with.” -Ibsen, H. 1879 Gin loves Aizen, but Ran was his best friend. AizenGin, suggested GinRan


"_Well, you see, there are people you love, and then there are other people you'd almost rather be with."_

_Ibsen, H. (1879). A Doll House._

---

Gin looked down at the dry white sand that lay in prefect contrast with the liquid dark of the night sky. He gave the impression of sighing, but his face and stance never changed. His heart was like that conflicting landscape.

He loved Aizen and after all why not? Aizen was strong enough to protect him, cold enough not to coddle him, and smart enough to see through all his smiles. Gin sifted against stark white wall his mocking face attentive and unrevealing, but his mind was far away in another world and another time.

_"Where did you get the food?" She pretended to care, but the hunger in her eyes betrayed her. She didn't care where the food was from, all she cared about was whether or not she could eat it. _

_"Ya' don't really wanna know so don't ask. That way we'll both be happier." He handed her the larger of the two loafs of bread. Large was relative of course, dinner rolls would have been a better description of the bread. They forced themselves to eat slowly, food was an uncertain commodity. He slid half of his bread into his clothes and he noticed her do the same. _

_It wasn't always like this. Sometimes they could catch fish or they would find a fruit tree and then the pair became like children and laughed and didn't worry, but that was rare and most of the time they lay huddled to together silent save their empty stomachs. _

_She shivered, it was late in the year and the cold was here. He was cold too, but he wouldn't let her know that. He stripped off his outer robe and handed it to her. This left him nothing but his very thin under clothes. _

_"If ya' get sick I ain't carin' fo' ya'." She looked at the robe._

_"But you'll freeze to death! Who will care for me then?" She cried._

_"Naw, ya' just ain't got no heart fo' the cold." She bit her lip; she knew he wouldn't admit to being cold too._

_"That's true, but I'd be warmer if you shared with me instead of just giving me the robe; it's rather thin." He nodded, apparently his pride could handled that much. _

_They lay wrapped in their outer clothes, shivering together against the cold._

_"Why is it like this?" She whispered, "What did we do when we were alive?"_

_"I ain't got no idea, somethin' pretty horrid I guess. Why else would we be cold and hungry lik' this?" _

The door, taller than anything living thing Gin had ever seen, opened and admitted a person whose presence dwarfed the door. Gin came to stand beside him when walked to the balcony wall.

"Ya' been wit' ya' Espada jus' now." There was no question as Gin rested his head on Aizen's arm.

"What makes you say that Gin?" Eyes that could be many things stared down at Gin.

"Ya' always look lik' ya' got the whole world in ya' han' when ya' spend time wit' 'em." Aizen raised a regal eyebrow.

"Do I?" Gin nodded a wormed closer to his captain. Aizen reached a hand around to trace Gin's strong jaw-line. He dropped his head enough to kiss Gin lightly on the lips. The opening of the door brought them apart.

"Aizen-sama, the hollow is ready to be unmasked." Tousen's blind eyes managed to give the impression of looking straight at Aizen.

"Thank-you Kaname, I'll be there in a moment." His hands lingered on Gin, "Are you coming Gin?" Gin slipped out of Aizen's hands and pranced over to his chair.

"Naw, the desert lookin' interestin' right now, 'sides it ain't lik' I won't hear 'bout it later." He flopped down in the chair with an almost feline grace.

"I'll be back later then." And with that Gin was alone again and again he let his mind wander.

_"You'll never believe what I just heard!" She cried running towards him. "There's a place where people like us aren't ever hungry and cold! There are even new clothes and soft beds!" Her starved face was glowing._

_"Ya ain't suppose ta' believe everthin' ya' hear." He said looking back down to where he was trying to start a small fire, having something to burn would have helped the effort greatly._

_"It's true! They live in a place call the __Seireitei!" She stomped her foot, it was amazing how much energy she could muster, "Look if you don't believe me come and see him!"_

_"Him?" He asked. Briefly he wondered if that prang in his jut was jealousy or hunger._

_"Yeah! He's got black robes and a long sword! He says I, we, could be like him!" He looked down at his attempt at fire and then up at her beaming face. _

_"Fine, but ya' gotta promise I ain't gonna hear no complaints about bein' cold ta'night!" She clapped her hands and grabbed his frail wrist. It was all he could do to be dragged after her. They came to the small trading post that they lived near and sure enough there was a man with black clothes and a long sword. The boy noticed he was wearing glasses, which meant he was rich enough to care what letters meant. _

_They stood there looking in awe at the man; they could feel the same power that robbed them of the food in their bellies rolling off him._

_"You're right, you're friend has just as much power as you. I think you two would do very well at the academy, unless you have something you can't leave behind here." The man seemed benevolent and he wore a kind smile, but the boy recognized the smile as being like his own and he wondered what was behind it. _

_"We ain't got nothin' but us." He said and she elbowed him sharply and gave him a hard look until he added, "Sir." _

_"Good, then there really isn't any reason to stay here all winter is there?" _

_---_

_Following the man proved to be smart. Despite the boy's skepticism the Seireitei did exist. The boy and the girl stood before its walls in their necks craning their eyes bulging trying to see it all. Suddenly she was scared and she grabbed his hand and made him stop, the man waited patiently a little ways ahead._

_"You're my best friend you know that right?" She said and he nodded still overwhelmed by the sheer mass of the place. _

_"Gin," His name drew his full attention to her, "Promise me that no matter what you'll be my best friend."_

_"Wha' could possibly happen tha' ain't happened alread'?" He asked and she pressed his hand harder._

_"Something good." She whispered, but then the fire came back into her voice, "Promise me!" _

_"Fine! I promise Ran, but ya' gotta know that there ain't 'nother person who could take ya' place." She smiled and loosened her hold on him, "Ya' think I could handle two of ya'?" He laughed and she smacked at him, but as they walked through those gates something changed and they both felt it. _

Gin rested his head on a thin hand and let his smile slide and his narrow eyes open. He loved Aizen, loved him truly, passionately, and loyally. There was nothing that could change that, but he wonder sometimes if it was right choice.

_"Gin!" He turned his smiling face revealing nothing. She had grown up in the few years they'd been there. It was hard to believe that she was the same starved little girl._

_"You've been avoiding me! I thought you promised to be my friend." He cocked his head sideways. _

_"I ain't been avoidin' ya', being Cap'n Aizen lieutenant ain't an easy job." Her face turned pouty._

_"So Captain Aizen is more important than your best friend?" His mask didn't falter._

_"Ya' bein' selfish Ran. I ain't got time right now, Cap'n Aizen needs me fo' somethin'." He tuned to leave waving to her without turning around. _

_"Wait!" She lunged forward and caught his arm. He smiled at her, but it would have been kinder to glare._

_"Don't leave me! Ever since you met him you've had no time for me! Sometimes I wish we'd never met him!" She cried._

_"Now ya' being dumb. Without Cap'n Aizen we'd both be dead." He started to pull away._

_"If I told you I loved you, would you still go to him?" There was pause that was a few seconds too long and tears swam in her eyes, "You would, wouldn't you?"_

_"Ya' my best friend, Ran, but it ain't smart ta' ask questions lik' tha'." With that he pulled away and was gone around the corner. As he turned the corner he saw her crumple to the ground sobbing, but he kept walking, Aizen was waiting. _

Gin shifted in the hard throne, yes, he loved Aizen, but Rangiku had been and still was his best friend. There was a sudden cold wind that managed to fling white sand clear to the balcony where Gin sat and a few grains landed on his lap. He loved Aizen, but sometime he wondered if he would have been happier with his best and only friend.


End file.
